Tuesday, May 04, 2010

That was then...this is now...

That was then...it was the mid-70's we were female, in college, and the "women's movement" was just showing the signs of coming to fruition. We were indoctrinated that we could do anything and everything....be a mom, have a career, marry a guy who could cook and do housework, and help with the kids.....nirvana awaited. (Never mind that I somehow grew up in a traditional family that didn't hold with traditional gender roles, and I never realized that I couldn't be an engineer or a veterinarian.) And I never even considered burning any piece of my underwear.

This is now...a woman of modest birth and education rises to a high political position as the governor of the largest state in the union. In that position she has a 15 billion dollar budget, control over the state national guard, and 15,000 state police. While in office, she arm wrestles big oil into providing stipends for state residents. She is a mother to 5 children, one with special needs (when she choses to continue the pregnancy). She has a hottie hubby who, probably along with nannies--let's be realistic, handles the kids when necessary. She hits the national stage, and what's the first criticism the icons of the women's movement level? Is it her policies? Is it fact based critiques of how state money was spent? Deficit spending? Nope! Women like Gloria Steinem and Sally Quinn, old guards of the women's movement, criticize her mothering of her children.

This is where the push for equality of women has brought us? Really? Haven't come too far have we ladies? Politics aside (whether one likes her or not), this is what women criticize? That she gave birth to a Down child because her personal stance is anti-abortion? Idiots.

That was then ... women were embarrassed and treated badly by authorities when they were sexually assaulted, especially when the abuser was an "acquaintance". They were blamed for leading him on, acting provocatively etc. The result was many perps were never punished. Women who were abused in this way, first by the criminal, then by the authorities, were debilitated for many years, if not forever. These kinds of scars are hard to overcome. The women's movement demanded better treatment for victims of sexual assault. Victims, but women in particular, were endowed with power to bring these criminals to justice. However, along with this power comes a responsibility, and some women didn't get the memo.

This is now... women are getting the sequence wrong. Somehow instead of understanding that one needs to respect oneself, that power is in the way one carries oneself through life (and this has nothing to do with short skirts, and ho' shoes), our younger, and probably elderly like me, women think that they have no responsibility to act like they actually respect themselves. They get snot snorting drunk and then couldn't identify an elephant in a nursery let alone someone who might have hurt them. But that's apparently OK. They willingly crawl into bed naked with someone (drunk or not), "do not say no" to the act, then decide it was rape after the fact - when the guilt sets in. (I wish I were making this up.) Our daughters have decided that it is OK to consciously act any way they want, then run to mommy and daddy judge (instead of mommy and daddy), and plead assault. Where are the strong women who make good decisions, keep control of their actions, and when they don't, take responsibility for them?

The upshot, of course, is that real, serious sexual crime, which is not as uncommon as I'd like, is tainted with this frivolous crap.

This is not popular of course. Victims advocates will find this appalling. However, because of our location, this is not an unheard of scenario. I am not talking about the woman who goes out for a few drinks, meets a guy, and gets ambushed on the walk to her apartment. I am not talking about the individual who leaves her window open on a hot night, and a lunatic crawls in her window and threatens her with a hammer. (Really happened. He's locked up for good, thanks to the victim's brave testimony.)

We, alas, have raised a generation of wimps. Where are the strong women who when they are harassed by another individual step up and tell the harasser that they're going to "rip their arm off and beat them over the head with the bloody stump", if they do not cease and desist, and in a loud enough voice to attract attention and embarrass the hell out of them? Where are they? I can not be the only one....

But we have to draw the line somewhere. Women who do not take themselves seriously, do a disservice to all the rest of us. Women who try to diminish others on their personal choices, rather than public action, do a disservice too. That's what the women's movement should have taught us.

Big fail!


kemtee said...

I'm over here. But then, I also have a concealed carry permit and I make full use of it.

I have said for years that the "women's movement" – which resembles other sorts of "movements" nowadays – cannot have it both ways. Don't bitch about glass ceilings if you're screaming victimhood out of the other side of your mouth.

Feminism – or rather, the feminist movement – outlived its usefulness a long time ago. As with other social movements, the attention whores in charge had to create some other emergency in order to justify their continued existence.

It doesn't speak to or for me. Personal responsibility isn't something that's ever going to be touted by someone who needs media face time to prop up their ego and their listless, fading, irrelevant social action organizations.

Chrisknits said...

Sing it Sister!

Bezzie said...

Jay Hammond was the first governor of AK to wrestle those oil companies for money for residents. Sarah just got them a one-time sum. PFDs are received every year for nearly 30 years now.
I don't like her. But it has nothing to do with how many kids she popped out or how she wears her hair.

Mag said...

I see and hear you loud and clear.
There was a large discussion about the shift from misogyny to misandry, in of all places, the Rav. It included a laundry list of our current "entitlements" as American women.
I could compare the shift to racial issues in America, but I think I might get lynched if I do. ;)

Fascism, Communism and Feminism, the three great failed ideologies of the 20th century.