Thursday, August 30, 2007

Why this is so intense...

....I keep wondering why I'm so intensely affected by the death of our friend, especially because we lost some contact with him over the last 10 years or so, and I've come to several conclusions.

First, I met him Fall 1976. That's 31 years ago, which startles me just thinking about it. He and the man I would eventually marry came to borrow a iron from my current sister-in-law. Let me clarify, though. Her brother, my current DH, came to borrow the iron. I do not believe our friend ever owned an iron in his entire, too short, life. He was letting my DH stay with him in his one room efficiency, while my DH was working on this thesis. That's the kind of guy he was.

We were close friends for many years, even when DH and I moved away for 10 years. He was like that with everyone though. If you wanted good service in a restaurant - go with this guy. Servers, both genders, loved him. You left the restaurant knowing more about the server than you did about your sibling.

He was the best man at our wedding. We were relatively "elderly" when we got married. So we didn't have the usual hoopla that accompanies such events. I told our friend that his ONLY job as best man was to get my soon-to-be DH to the chapel on time. (DH is often not where he should be at the time he needs to be.) About 10 minutes before the service was to begin, my sister, who has a wicked sense of humor came down to the "brides" room. I guess I was supposed to be primping, but anyone who knows me knows that a "primper" I am not. Instead I was wishing we had had the presence of mind to stop and pick up a bottle of wine. She said "Guess who's not here?" My first and only thought, which I expressed, was "I'm going to kill him!" (Not stopping to decide which who I was going to kill.)She responded, "Who? soon-to-be DH? Oh no! He's here! "Your" mother isn't here yet!" (Just to clarify it's her mother too, but we sometimes have been known to deny parentage when convenient.) Apparently the person driving my parents to the chapel got lost. But our friend came through with flying colors, and I remain grateful to this day.

There are lots of stories. Most showing what a good guy he was. (A little "off the beam" as my sister-in-law observed.) I often wished that we had remained close, but life sometimes doesn't agree. You have to play the hand you're dealt I guess.

OK, to mitigate the maudlin stuff here is a photo of my first completed chevron sock. I've been promising knitting. There's more, but I need to be home when it's light to get it right! Once I got the sizing right, this was a nice pattern to knit. I love it with the stripes.

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